Just got back from Ken McCarthy’s System Intensive in Vancouver,
Canada. Really it was just an excuse to get up North for the
weekend . . . and for my friend Katie to have her car broken into
by some wiley Canucks. Beautiful city, though, check it out if you
get the chance.
In this issue:
* How to take your solo business from struggle to six figures in
six months or less.
* Phil Collins is a Big Hairy Ape
=========================
How To Take Your Solo Business From Struggle To Six Figures In Six
Months Or Less
=========================
Beth Yockey-Jones and I are on a mission to help indie pros and
solo small business folks crack the six figure mark and join the
ranks of the upper lower middle sideways class.
But to do it right, we need your help. If you’re a solo pro (no
teeming offices full of pouty-faced employees) do me a favor and
pop over to . . .
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=N69PCmnuewj2N0Is_2bEBqGg_3d_3d
. . . and fill out our handy dandy survey. I don’t have anything
to bribe you with, but if you help us you can feast on the
satisfaction of a job well done.
========================
Phil Collins Is A Big Hairy (Expensive And Ineffective) Monkey
========================
I love Phil Collins.
Love him.
I mean, I know it’s not cool to say . . . but ever since I first
saw Genesis’ “Land Of Confusion” video back in 1986, I’ve been an
un-ironic fan.
Something about a Ronald Reagan puppet slamming the “Big Red
Button” and triggering nuclear annihilation on a global scale just
warmed the cockles of my then nine-year-old heart . . . and sent me
bounding around the house like a dangerous ADD-addled cyclone.
(To this day, all I have to do is hum a few bars of that cold war
anthem to make my poor mom shiver, twitch and curl up in the fetal
position to cry.)
So when I was sitting in a Vancouver movie theatre on Friday and
heard the first couple lines of Phil’s “In The Air Tonight”, my
ears perked up.
What followed over the next two minutes was one of the coolest
little bits of viral video I’ve ever seen. . . and a *really,
really, really bad ad.*
You see, on Friday that whole roomful of pantsless Canadians and I
(as far as I can tell, Canadians always wear t-shirts and shorts,
even when it’s bitterly, bitterly cold) watched in rapt attention
as a thick-fingered ape pounded out the beat to Collins’ 1981
classic.
It was a heck of a piece of filmmaking. The camera focused in close
on the monkey’s flared nostrils. It glided up his cheek to see the
intensity in his eyes. And then it pulled back just in time for the
big “DU-BBA . . .DU-BBA . . .DU-BBA” bit that kicks off the song
proper.
Me and the whole crowd? Just quiet and shocked. Watching that
weirdly real-looking ape work the high hat, pound on the skins and
keep time better than most modern rock drummers was literally
*dumbfounding.*
But as an ad? It *sucked.*
Why? Because that big ape with the drum sticks has been stuck in my
brain for *days* now . . . but 20 seconds after the ad flickered
off the screen I couldn’t remember what the hell it was supposed to
be selling.
Because *It Wasn’t Selling Anything At All.*
Now, I can imagine the pitch meeting where some cool-glasses
wearing creative type laid out the “strategy” behind this thing
(“Well, you see, the Ape is experiencing Joy and our tag line is
that Cadbury creates Joy.”) . . . and I bet the suits at Cadbury
(theoretically this ad is supposed to be selling Cadbury . . .um. .
.pudding? I’ve seen the ad three times and I’m still not quite
sure.) are *ecstatic* at the reception they’re getting from their
golf buddies. I mean, heck, people have seen the ad! People are
talking about their monkey!
*But in ground level marketing reality this is a tremendous flop
and a phenomenal waste of money.*
In direct marketing, there’s a really simple ad-writing formula
called “AIDA.” It stands for “Attention, Interest, Desire and
Action” and is a basic map most copywriters and real marketing
folks use when trying to close a sale. You get attention, develop
interest, create desire and then ask for action. It’s simple and
effective and has been used to sell *billions* of dollars of
information and stuff over the years.
Just for fun, let’s apply the AIDA test to our drumming ape.
Now, for me at least (and most of the Canadian crowd at the movies
on Friday) this thing did a *great job* of getting my attention. I
mean, heck, it’s an ape drumming along to Phil Collins. What more
do you need.
And for it’s full 2 minutes, the ad kept my interest.
But desire? Action? Uh uh. The only *desire* I had after watching
this thing was to listen to some old Genesis records . .. and the
only action I took was to store the experience away in my brain to
rant about on Monday morning.
Now, I can hear the ad weasels on my list grumbling and
complaining, saying that this wasn’t a direct response ad and was
just meant to “Build the Cadbury brand.”
But even by that weak, weak argument (in my opinion *all* ads
should be designed with a set response in mind) this thing is an
utter failure. Why? Because a drumming monkey doesn’t have a damn
thing to do with chocolate and never will.
=============================
OK, Haddad, You Don’t Like The Ad, But What’s The Lesson Here?
=============================
Just this: There’s a big lie put out there that you can *entertain*
people into buying your stuff. And there’s a sliver (just a sliver)
of truth to that. If you’re entertaining enough people *might*
stick around to hear what you say. But that doesn’t give you a pass
to ignore *basic* salesmanship. The fact of the matter is that
Cadbury has spent *millions* producing this ad and buying space to
show it off . . . and that they probably aren’t going to make a
single additional sale of their stuff ( . .um. . . what the hell
were they selling again?) because of it.
You can check out the drumming monkey (in all his dumbfounding,
ineffective glory) at
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0-aIms6oKY&watch_response
And if you want to see a company that really *gets* how to use
entertaining video to sell its stuff, head on over to
http://www.willitblend.com/
Blender + iPhone + Good Kitschy Production values = a blender
selling powerhouse.
And that’s it folks. You can find more on the Hard Working Words
Blog at http://www.haddadink.com/blog
Happy Thanksgiving.
c
About This Newsletter and Your Subscription
=======================================
©2007 Haddad Ink. Copywriting Services. All Rights Reserved.
If you like this article
=======================
Feel fre*e to share it with your own list, post it on
your site, post it on your blog, or add it to your
autoresponder. As long as you leave it intact and
don’t alter it in anyway. All links must remain
in the article.
And give me a shout out asking folks to subscribe by emailing
hwwords@aweber.com
Please notify me when my article is used online and off line.
===================================================
Haddad Ink., 1463 E. Republican St. #28A, Seattle, WA 98112
More
Eric’s a smart ass (a tall smart ass who’s only 21 but who makes truckloads online.)
“When I first met Chris Haddad I thought he was an odd looking bald man
who had a strange pension for salsa dancing.. Later though he proved to
be one of the most natural copywriters I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing.
This guys cranks out more high converting, excitement generating copy than
anyone else in the business, and he does it faster too!
If you’re looking to rapidly grow your profits with copy you can count on
converting well from the start look no further than Chris… Despite his love of
dance and premature baldness he’s a great guy and extremely talented
(especially at his surprisingly low rates!).
He is who I turn to, and you should too…. But make sure you give him a hard time 
”
Eric Farewell
Internet Marketing Guru Advisor & Launch Manager
www.EricFarewell.com
More
This will be going on the main site soon (and on the super secret new site and blog in the near future) but I figure it’s just too damn hot to keep under wraps.
“After 16 years in business and over $57 Million in sales, I’m damned
picky about who I ask to write for me. Chris is a salesman through and
through. His copy sucks in cash like a nuclear powered vacuum cleaner
and he’s added hundreds of thousands of dollars to my bottom line. If
you get the chance, hire Chris. He’s fast, ridiculously easy to work
with and always delivers results.” – Jeff Paul, Internet Marketing Millionaire and Author of “How To Make Money Sitting At Your Kitchen Table In Your Underwear.”
More
I think this is the first time in six months that I’ve had pants on before 11AM . . . and it feels great.
I’m plopped down in a cheap but comfy office chair at Office Nomads–a big brick-walled dream put together by local tech-geek and cap-wearer Jacob Sayles. ON’s new space cavernous–over 5,000 square feet–and decked out with donuts, coffee, a printer and a bunch of smiling Seattle Indie Pros blinking at the light and remembering what it’s like to be out of their home-office caves and out in the world again.
I’ve gotten more done in the last hour than I typically do all day working at home. And as part of ON’s grand opening he’s letting people plop down and work for free.
Check it out at officenomads.com . . . and come down and get some damn work done.
More
As I write this I’m sitting in an overpacked train car humming its way from Portland to Seattle . The train is listing from side to side and making me seasick. Which is a bit funny, since I’m nowhere near the sea.
I’m going to be at Ken McCarthur’s JV Alert seminar down in Long Beach, CA this weekend paling around with fellow bald copywriter (and all around fine human being) Mike Morgan. If you’re there, hunt me down like the ridiculous ferret that I am and I’ll buy you a drink . . . and give you drunken marketing and copywriting advice gratis.
In today’s (hopefully brief–these things always *explode* once I start typing) issue of the HWW newsletter you’ll learn:
* Why Theron Gordon punched me in the face.
* Why a “reason why” is one of the most important things you can put into your marketing.
====================================
Why Theron Gordon Punched Me In The Face
====================================
It was pizza day when it happened.
I was standing in line outside the North Grafton Elementary School cafeteria, bouncing from heel to heel and dreaming of artery-clogging cheesy goodness when Theron Gordon–as massive and brutish and cruel as any 4th grader could ever hope to be–turned around, let out a bassy “Huh Huh Huh” and slammed me in the face with a fist the size of a a ripe coconut and the texture of a pound and a half of thin-sliced honey ham.
*SHMUNK!* was the sound. He hit me square in the nose.
Blood poured down my face and onto my brand-spanking new Vaurnet T-shirt. I crumpled to the floor and sobbed like . . . um . . .well, like the oversensitive geeky 4th grader that I was. I heard the teachers coming and the kids all around me sniggering and teasing.
I looked up into Theron’s big, dumb cow eyes and through the blood and the tears and the deep, deep humiliating shame I asked him “whu . . . whu. . . why?”
====================
What’s the “Reason Why?”
====================
Quick quiz: What’s the single most important thing you can pack into your sales and marketing copy that will immediately skyrocket your credibility and supersize your sales?
A compelling and believable “Reason Why.”
As human beings, we’re hard wired to want to know the “reason why” something happened.
*Why* did the seemingly nice and normal guy down the street go nuts and do unfortunate things to his neighbors with a machete?
*Why* did your weird Aunt Millie who you never quite got along with decide to pick *you* to take care of her 37 cats when she died?
*Why* did my brother (who’s smart and successful and a great guy) vote for G.W. Bush in the last two elections?
======================================
And It’s Even Worse When It Comes To Marketing
======================================
Customers are cynical and jaded creatures who see BS and sneaky motivations behind everything (and heck, with all the spam, bad marketing and unethical crap out there, they have every reason to.)
If you want to sell to them, break down their skepticism, stand out from the herd and be the one savvy marketer to dodge past their defenses and worm your way into their pockets, you’ve got to pack your copy and your ads with super-solid reasons why.
*Why* are your widgets better than any other widgets in widgetdom?
*Why* are you the cheapest (or most expensive) option, and *why* is that a good thing?
*Why* are you only offering 50 of this super awesome and amazing package before pulling it off the market forever?
*Why* is your guarantee twice as generous and three times as long as anybody else’s?
*Why* should I go to all the bother of fishing my wallet out of the pocket of my too-tight jeans and go through all the rigamarole of of typing in my credit card number . . and *why* should I do it right now?
Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?
If you give solid, compelling and believable *reasons why* to all the questions running through the back of your customer’s heads you’ll build trust, gain credibility and make big heaping piles of money that make Scrooge McDuck’s money pit look like a piggy bank.
And if you *don’t*?
Well, then you’ll end up like I was all those years ago in fourth grade: crumpled on the floor with tears in your eyes wondering *why* it all went so terribly, terribly wrong.
So here’s your assignment for the month: Take a long look at your web copy, your sales brochure, your snazzy new video or whatever else you use as the engine of your sales process and ask yourself “Is this giving a compelling, overt ‘reason why’?”
If so, pat yourself on the back and buy yourself some icecream.
And if not? Well, I think you know the *why* of what you have to do next.
(P.S. I never did find out why it was that Theron Gordon decked me that day. And it still drives me nuts. My only comfort is that he probably drives a forklift 12 hours a day at some skeezy Massachusetts warehouse.)
(P.P.S. I’ve actually been punched in the face twice in my life. The second time left me with a fake tooth and a great story about why my brother and I get along so darned well these days. Ask me in person and I’ll tell you.)
More
As I’m writing this I’ve got 4 hours left as a twenty-something.
Come midnight I’ll hit 30 years old . . . and will watch in horror
as my body falls apart before my wide, unbelieving eyes. By morning
I’ll be nothing but a snarky puddle of marketing knowledge. Fear
for me. And pray I can get this newsletter finished before it’s too
late.
In this, the 32nd issue of the HWW newsletter you’ll learn:
-How I bought Jeff Paul a Bentley (and other startling success
stories)
-The awful danger of Marketing Ostrich Theory
=========================
How I Bought Jeff Paul A Brand New Car (and other startling
success stories.)
=========================
In my career as a high-fallutin’ copywriter and marketing wonk I’ve
had some pretty darned good successes.
I’ve boosted conversions, built businesses and earned astonished
praise from clients . . .
And now I’ve bought Jeff Paul a Bentley.
Or at least given him the cash to buy one if he wants.
Jeff is probably one of the best known (and most successful)
internet marketers out there, pulling down millions of dollars
selling info products over the last 15 years and teaching literally
hundreds of thousands of people how to “Make Money Free And Easy In
His Underwear.”
Jeff’s also a client . . . and just last week he used a sales
letter I wrote for him as a teleseminar script and pulled down
$300K in just under 60 minutes.
You can check out the letter at http://www.gurumillions.com
And if you’re looking to add that kind of marketing firepower in
your corner, shoot me a line at chris@haddadink.com
====================
Marketing Ostrich Theory . . .
====================
I blame my Mom.
I mean, she’s a sweet lady and I love her, but somehow she let me
get through 30 full years on this planet still believing that
ostriches bury their heads in the sand (she also let me believe
that Santa Claus existed until an embarrassing age and filled my
head with strange ideas about the Easter Bunny and classic
economics theory. Like I said, she’s sweet.)
The ostrich thing is a lie of course . . . a pop culture myth
perpetrated by Tex Avery cartoons and science teachers who don’t
believe in evolution (since any ostrich that *really* did bury it’s
head in the sand would be eaten right quick.)
What an Ostrich *really* does when it feels threatened is kick you
hard in the mouth and run . . .fast.
But still, every day I meet otherwise smart and savvy business
owners and marketers who seem to run their businesses on “Mythical
Ostrich Marketing Theory . . . ”
===================
What The Heck Does That Mean?
===================
It means that they bury their head in the sand (or in spreadsheets,
over-mined data a big ideas) and utterly fail to notice all the
other ostriches (or businesses) all around them.
And that they forget that *nobody* buys in a vacuum . . . and that
by the time a customer talks to them, they’ve probably already
talked to just about every other ostrich in the field.
======================
Here’s What This Is All About
======================
If a customer clicks on your PPC ad, clicks on a link in an email
or stumbles onto your page in the wild and gets funneled into your
lovingly crafted sales page you *don’t* just have to convince them
to buy from you . . . you have to convince them to buy from you
*instead* of somebody else.
And have to quiet the little voice in the back of their head that’s
doing backflips and throwing a fit wondering if they’re making the
right choice.
So how do you do that?
By hitting the objection head-on, making it really apparent what
separates you from the other guys and telling your customers in no
uncertain terms what your product or service is *not.”
Your weight loss pill is *not* “just another unhealthy scam that’s
going to wreak havoc with your body and leave you fatter than ever
six months down the line.”
Your real estate seminar is *not* “more recycled, overpriced drivel
you’ve already heard and ignored before.”
Your seduction ebook is *not* just more sleazy advice telling you
how to trick girls into going home with you . . .and making you
feel like a loser and a creep.
By throwing copy like that up nice and early on your page you
accomplish two big goals:
1. You establish that you’re different than all the other
ostriches out there.
2. You subtly (or not so) intimate that if this is what you’re
*not,* maybe it’s what all those other folks are.
For a nice example of this kind of copy in action, check out
http://www.1millionliquid.com/index2.html (and ignore the design.)
And that’s it, folks. And with 3 hours to go until I’m old, old, old.
If you want to chat, hit me at chris@haddadink.com.
See you in my 30s.
About This Newsletter and Your Subscription
=======================================
©2007 Haddad Ink. Copywriting Services. All Rights Reserved.
If you like this article
=======================
Feel fre*e to share it with your own list, post it on
your site, post it on your blog, or add it to your
autoresponder. As long as you leave it intact and
don’t alter it in anyway. All links must remain
in the article.
And give me a shout out asking folks to subscribe by emailing
hwwords@aweber.com
Please notify me when my article is used online and off line.
===================================================
Haddad Ink., 1463 E. Republican St. #28A, Seattle, WA 98112
More
Hey Folks,
I was at rehearsal for a play last night when I spotted another actor’s copy of “Skeptic” magazine . . . and immediately grabbed it out of his hands and read the full page ad on the back.
Why? Because of the frankly fascinating headline. It read:
“Before The Bible Was The Bible It Was A Bunch Of Little Books Written By A Bunch Of Different Writers With Different Viewpoints”
And it got me thinking “Wow, what a great headline” quickly followed by “Ok, but why the heck does this headline work?”
Because there’s no discernible benefit here . . .
And the language in the headline and the ad is as hype free and “Logic-based” as you can get (which fits the publication readership pretty well.)
I sort of chuckled as I though about some alternate headlines:
“Who Else Wants To Discover The Secret Terrible Truth Of The Bible That *They* Don’t Want You To Know”
“Finally Revealed . . . Here’s How *You* Can Learn To Be Even More Arch And Superior At Parties! You Won’t Believe How Easy It Is To Fill The Empty Void In Your Soul By Systematically Ripping Apart Other People’s Entire Belief Systems . . While Still Leaving Room For Dessert!”
“They Laughed When I Said The Bible Was Written By A Bunch Of Different Folks Who Didn’t Like Each Other Very Much . . . But When I Clicked On The Projector And Showed Them My Powerpoint. . . ”
“How A Skinny, Balding, One-Legged, No-Elbowed, Non-Tenured Professor *Accidentally* Took On The *Fat Cats* of ‘Big Religion’ And Knocked Over 2,000 Years Of Tradition To Its KNEES . . . Almost Overnight!”;)
Etc. Etc. Etc.
Anyway, what do you think makes the “Before The Bible Was The Bible” line work so well? And if you’ve got any other alternate headlines throw them up (though remember, we’re here to talk copy, not religion.)
Oh, and tangentially, flipping through the magazine I found an article by someone debunking the newfangled traction machines you hear about a lot of chiropractors using. What was fascinating to me was hearing her talk about the marketing used to sell the stuff. She quoted the headline (A “Who else” and sniggered at the “bad grammar” in the “free report” she got when she asked for more info.
More
Hey Folks,
Busy times here at Hard Working Words Headquarters. Projects piled up like Jenga pieces, clients calling with effusive praise. It’s a tough life. I’m booked out for the next several weeks. If you’ve got a burning project you want to talk about, pick up the phone, call 206-550-5558 and let’s talk about it now so I can get you on the schedule.
And now on to the main course.
Warning: This may be the most offensive issue of HWW ever.
Really. I mean it.
So don’t go writing me later and saying I didn’t warn you.
In today’s issue you’ll learn:
* What homeless people know about marketing that most high-fallutin business owners don’t.
====================
Fishing For Ninja Lessons
====================
The guy had a crazy look in his eye. Crazy and mean. He stared right at me, grinned wide with broken yellow teeth and held up his battered cardboard sign like it was a prized summer squash and I might be the judge who would finally make his County Fair dreams come true.
“Ninjas Killed My Family,” it read: “Need Money For Kung-Fu Lessons.”
I smiled nervously, gave the guy a buck (because I really do think we need more homeless folk with badass martial skills) and shuffled on my way.
===================
And I Thought About How Some Homeless People Seem To Know Know More About Good, Effective And *Profitable* Marketing Than Most High-Fallutin Business Owners Do
===================
Because, you see, this wasn’t the first time I’d seen that particular Ninja sign. As a professional Copywriter and Marketing Wonk (and a born-and-bred East Coaster living in the passive-aggressive West) I travel a lot and have a tendency to pick up on recurring messages . . .
And it seems like every city I go to, I see the same “headlines” plastered on well-worn cardboard signs . . . .
* Ninja Killed My Family . . . in San Francisco . . .
* Fishing For A Beer . . . . outside Atlanta . . .
* Need Money For Bus Fare . . . in LA
And a whole slew of other time tested and proven money makers spread out all over this country being used again and again to drag dollars and coins out of millions of harried pedestrians and to keep hundreds of thousands of desperate street folk in the the food and/or vices of their choice.
===========================
Alright, Haddad, What’s Your Point?
===========================
Just this:
A homeless person standing on a street corner with a sign in his hand and a hat at his feet is, just like the rest of us, in the business of selling. . .
But unlike a lot of marketers, homeless folks aren’t worried about creativity . . .
They’re not worried about being clever. . .
And they’re not worried about what people think or what their golf buddies might say after tipping back three beers and rounding on the back nine.
All they *are* worried about is making the sale.
So when they’re sitting down to draw up an “ad” or to come up with a pitch designed to part you from your cash, the only thing on their mind is “What can I put on this sign that will put the most amount of money in my pocket today?”
“What message can I put down here that’s going to pull the heartstrings just the right way or make people giggle just enough for them to reach into their pocket and give me some of that change so I can get a burger in my belly or a roof over my head?”
So homeless folks, unlike a lot of high-fallutin well funded marketers *swipe* proven concepts that have worked before (or are working right now) and *test* their signs. . .
If they hear about a sign that’s working really well in another “market” they draw it up and try it themselves.
And if they find something that works, they ride that horse hard day after day until it sputters and collapses just about dead at their feet or until they find something that works even better.
===============================================
In Other Words, They Act Like Smart and Savvy Direct Marketers.
===============================================
Yesterday I was chatting with my friend and Mentor (yes, he deserves a capital M) David Garfinkel about this, and he spouted off with this little piece of wisdom: “The cost of failure is huge, but the cost of advertising is negligible.”
Which means it’s a lot cheaper to do some testing and fail small, than it is to go in both guns blazing and fail big.
==================================
So Here’s Your Assignment, Faithful Reader
==================================
1. Next time your walking down the street and accosted by a homeless person with a particularly good sign (and one who isn’t holding a bottle of vodka and isn’t shouting at you) drop a buck in his hat.
2. And take a long hard look at your website, your ad or your other materials and ask your self “What can I do to market more like a homeless person?”
—
That’s all folks. See, I told you it was going to be offensive. Well, offensive to some.
Comments, questions, harsh invectives? Hit me up at chris@haddadink.com
And you can learn more about what I do and how I do it at http://www.haddadink.com and http://www.haddadink.com/blog
More
Surfing the web yesterday, I stumbled on an article (actually a whole sea of articles . . . it’s big news) saying that Obesity is a social virus. Basically, if you’re friends get fat, you’ll probably get fat too. And if you get fat. . . well, your friends are doomed to having to buy stretchy pants at Target.
Strangely enough I see a similar phenomenon in the small and medium-sized business communities I bounce around. Hang out with folks who are successful and you’ll become more successful. Hang out with folks who pour all their energy into utterly ineffective brand building ads and wonder why customers aren’t pounding down their door and . . . well, you get the idea.
More
Hey folks,
Welcome to big 30th issue of the Hard Working Words Newsletter . .
. and the first to be written from my swank new Capitol Hill condo.
If you read carefully I’m sure the sheer “I’m a homeowner”
pretentiousness and hardwood floor feel will seep right through
your eyes and into your brain.
Shorter issue today. Of course I said that about the last issue and
it was a whopper. So we’ll see what happens.
In today’s big issue you’ll learn:
* What the heck was under that scarf?
* How to use “secrets” to turn your prospects into salivating
consumerist zombies! (wait, is that a good thing?)
And much more.
Or a little more.
Definitely more.
It’s best if you imagine the title to today’s article in a big,
jagged B-horror movie font.
=====================================
The Secret Of The Scarf
=====================================
It was a red scarf. Red and wool. The girl had it pulled tight
around her neck and folded over in the front like an over-sized,
warm and toasty neck tie.
This was in London in 1998. I was a skinny, long-haired,
trench-coat-wearing quasi-goth bouncing my way around town, seeing
way too much theatre and interning for Norma Heyman: the tough old
“bird” who had produced “Dangerous Liaisons.”
And I was obsessed.
Obsessed with *The Scarf.*
The girl was in three of my classes. She wasn’t particularly pretty
or interesting. Most days she just sort of sat with a soft glaze on
her eyes, occasionally perking up to say something about “Peter Pan
and the dominant patriarchy” or to mumble about the staggering
amount we *weren’t* learning in our media studies class.
And day after day, week after week for all the 6 months we were
there, she wore *the scarf.*
In a sweltering theater, at a cozy restaurant, on a class trip to
Scotland . . . heck, I’m pretty sure she even wore it to bed.
Always tied up tight and solid around her neck, forming an
impenetrable seal between whatever secret horror adorned her throat
and the world outside.
Every time I saw her, my mind went into a fit. “What was under
there?,” my brain would scream. “What horrible, horrible thing was
she hiding?”
Was it a jagged scar from a childhood game of lawn darts gone
horribly wrong?
The tiny, useless remnants of an ill-fated parasitic twin?
An elaborate tattoo expertly memorializing a dying love?
What? What? What?
Weeks went by. Then months. The thick wool of winter was replaced
with a lacy (but no less opaque) pink chiffon number.
The lighter material discounted several of my more . . .err. .
.bulbous medical theories, but I was no closer to discovering the
secret. I was no closer to the truth.
I went a little mad there in London.
I lay awake at night devising elaborate scarf removing plans. I
ignored my school. I prattled endlessly to my poor friend Tara,
ruining at least one viewing of “Les Mis” and leading her to
threaten me with a heavy Greek statue.
Finally, with just a week left before we all piled back onto the
plane for “the colonies” I’d had enough. I shuffled up to her after
class one day, forced on some fake charm and just asked:
“So . . .uh. . heh . . heh. . . what’s with the . . . what’s with
the scarf? I mean . . . . do you have like a . . . . ha . . . like
a goiter under there or something? Haha. Ha. Ha?”
She just sort of stared at me. And then, slowly, her fingers
crawled up to her neck and traced a line along the top of the
material. She pulled lightly at the knot. The scarf unfolded and
bunched down into her hand revealing . . . . nothing.
Just a neck. Just a throat. Nothing secret or special or horrifying
at all.
With a weirded-out half smile she looked up at me and said “I just
like scarves.”
======================
OK, Haddad, That Was Creepy. But What’s The Point?
======================
Just this.
Like me with my scarf-wearing “friend,” humans are absolutely
obsessed with secrets. We’re hard wired to want special knowledge,
to be in on the joke and to be part of that rarified elite who
*really* knows what’s going on.
And if we’re denied access to that special knowledge . . . if we’re
told that we aren’t good enough, special enough or worthy?
Well, we go just a little mad, salivate like hungry lions and will
do just about *anything* to get back on the inside.
=====================
Which is Why Secrets . . . Or Even Just The Idea Of Secrets Are
Some Of The Most Powerful Weapons In Your Marketing Arsenal
=====================
So here’s your assignment:
No matter what industry you’re in, it down and start writing out
ways you can *tease* your prospects with “secrets” that will have
an impact on their business or their life.
And offer to give them those “secrets” in exchange for an email
address, a phone call or some other way of getting in touch.
For an example of how I used this technique for a client, check out
http://www.creditinsiderclub.com
That’s it folks.
Check out more at:
http://www.haddadink.com
http://www.haddadink.com/blog
=======================================
About This Newsletter and Your Subscription
=======================================
©2007 Haddad Ink. Copywriting Services. All Rights Reserved.
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===================================================
Haddad Ink., 1463 E. Republican St. #28A, Seattle, WA 98112
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