My big brother (finance wiz Ken Haddad . . . who’s actually significantly shorter than I am) wants me to let everyone know that when he and his wife came to visit, they trudged up and down Seattle soggy hills for 5 days straight without even the smallest complaint. So obviously they’re cooler than my friends Scott and Mason.
So there.
Hi folks,
Chris “Mr. Moneyfingers” Haddad here with a very, very late edition of HWW.
I’ve been down in LA the last couple days at Eben Pagan’s “Altitude” program.
If you don’t know who Eben Pagan is, you should. He built a $20 Million dollar a year “Dating Advice” empire in 6 short years and is easily one of the smartest and savviest marketing minds I’ve had the pleasure of meeting.
Most of the seminars I’ve been to in my marketing career have been pricy and badly disguised pitch-athons, but my two days at Altitude were nothing but great networking and pure content.
You can sign up for Eben’s list at http://www.getaltitude.com.
With that out of the way, let’s get to the main event:
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How Far Is “Far?” – Why Jargon is *Killing* Your Sales
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A bit over a year ago, my good friends Scott and Mason flew out to Seattle for a couple days of intense male bonding.
And we had a *great* time.
We trekked out to Snoqualmie Falls, marveled at the Sci-Fi Museum, rocked it at the Experience Music Project , basked in the Seattle sunshine (I swear, it really doesn’t rain that much. Really.) and generally acted like giddy and goofy tourists just getting a taste for life on the coast.
Like I said, it was a great visit and a lot of fun . . .
*Until I Made The Big Mistake Of Suggesting We Go Out For Pizza.*
This was on day four of a four day visit. We were all tired and punchy and sick of being in the same room. And we were *hungry.* After 10 minutes of trying to figure out what to eat, we had this conversation:
Me: “Let’s just go out and grab some pizza. There’s a place right down the street.”
Them: “Is it far?”
Me: “Far?”
Them: “We’re tired and punchy and weak with hunger. We don’t want to walk far.”
Me: “No, it’s not far at all. It’s just down the street. I go there for lunch all the time.”
And to me it really *wasn’t* far. I’ve been a car-free American for about 3 years now, walk *everywhere* and, more importantly, am used to the staggering and brutal hills that make up the Seattle landscape.
Mason and Scott? Well, not so much.
It took a bit, but . . .
*After About Ten Minutes Of Marching I Figured Out That *My* Definition Of “Far” And *Their* Definition Of Far Were About As Similar As Apples And Nuclear Warheads.*
Them: “Dear God, are we there yet? I thought you said it wasn’t far?”
Me: “It’s not. We’re almost there.”
Them: “You said it was down the street!”
Me: “It is down the street!”
Them: “Which street?”
Me: “That street!”
Them: “That street is far!”
And it kind of went on from there. I think at one point we devolved into a Laurel and Hardy routine. Scott was so hungry that he decided to take his chances with some wild berries we saw on the way (that was a mistake.) And Mason did something that I don’t want to talk about here but that still makes we wake in the night covered in sweat and wishing for chocolate.
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“Alright, Haddad, But What The Heck Does This Have To Do With Marketing?”
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Good question, and one that I even have an answer to.
You see, the problem I had with Scott and Mason is pretty darned similar to a problem a lot of businesses have when they try to talk to their customers.
A lot of businesses (especially tech companies, medical pros and folks who sell supposedly complicated products and services) fill their marketing with words that mean one thing to them, and something completely different to the people they’re trying to sell to . . . .
Or worse yet, they pack their ads, websites and brochures with all sorts of fancy proprietary jargon that means a lot to them (“Our solution solutionator uses the latest in solutionization schemes to solutionize!”) but that leaves their prospects confused, annoyed and feeling abused . . . . and are confused when the money *doesn’t* come rolling in.
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So How Can You Conquer The Jargon Plague And Make Sure You’re Actually Speaking Your Customers Language?
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Well, I’ve got two *really* simple ways to obliterate jargon and figure out what words actually mean to your customers.
1. Visit forums and message boards that your customers use and pay really close attention to how the average folks on the board (not the super technical folks who go to message boards to feel good about themselves) talk.
And (this next one is shocking.)
2. Ask them.
You see, if I had just asked Scott and Mason what they meant by “Far” before heading off on our deadly zombie march to the pizza place, I would saved us all a lot of horror and heartache.
And if you just ask your own customers (over email, through a survey or even one on one) what the language around your product or service means to them, you’ll earn more customers, make more sales and pocket more money.
And that’s it, folks.
I’ll be posting something new to the blog (http://www.haddadink.com/blog) next week. If you have any questions or comments, you can hit me up at chris@haddadink.com
And you can learn more about me at http://www.haddadink.com.
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Haddad Ink., 1463 E. Republican St. #28A, Seattle, WA 98112
Hi folks,
Welcome back to the HWW blog.
In today’s *big* first post of 2008 I’m going to reveal a super-simple method you can use to “dumb down” your copy for massively increased sales . . . Plus I will literally put my foot in my own mouth as I praise a feature of my *least favorite* software program.
(Tangentially, I hope you had a Happy Holiday and a Rocking New Year. I went on a whirlwind tour of the East Coast followed 3 days up at Whistler Mountain in Canada followed by about 4 days of excruciating pain back here in Seattle as my back decided that I’d had just about enough fun and that it was time for me to suffer. But enough of that . . . back to the point.)
Ok, quick quiz, what are the three big traits that your copy needs to have if it’s going to close a sale?
Think about it.
No, really, I mean it.
Done yet?
Ok, I’ll tell you:
Copy that closes sales and makes money absolutely *has to be* . . .
1. *Exciting*
2. *Persuasive*
And
3. *Simple.*
*Exciting* means that your copy needs to be compelling and even fun to read. Your reader should actually be *enjoying* herself as she slides down the slippery slope towards a sale . . .
*Persuasive* means that your copy needs to stack up emotional and logical arguments that make it just about impossible for your prospect *not* to buy what you’re selling . . .
And *simple* means that your copy is written in a way that you’re average semi-literate 7th grader could easily understand.
A lot of newbie copywriters and business owners who are writing their own stuff fall into what I call “the trap of the high fallutin’”
They pack their sales letters and ads full of jargon, 10 dollar words and weird, circular sentence structures all in a desperate effort to look smart . . .
And they completely fail to connect with their audience and *make money.*
My friend and mentor David Garfinkel turned me on to a great quote by Ernest Hemingway (who’s one of the *simplest* writers out there.)
Hemingway said: “I use the oldest words in the English language. People think I’m an ignorant bastard who doesn’t know the $10 words. I know the $10 words. There are older and better words which, if you arrange them in the proper combination, you make it stick.”
What Hemingway is saying here is that if you use shorter, punchier and more powerful words (and shorter words are almost always more powerful) you’ll make a much bigger *impact* on the mind of your prospect . . . and will have a much higher chance of making the sale.
Need another example? Think about George Carlin’s “7 Words You Can’t Say On Television” (This is a family blog, so I won’t type them out here.) or just think about swears in general. There’s a reason the “best” swears are all 4 letters long . . . and that’s because *short,* *simple* words have impact that *long,* *complicated* words utterly lack.
“But Chris,” I can hear you saying “My audience is full of Harvard MBA’s, brainiac tech heads and folks who wasted their youth getting a Masters in English Literature. Doesn’t that mean that I have to write in a ’smarter’ style?”
And the answer is “not even a little.”
No matter how specialized or (over)-educated your audience is, you’re still selling to *people* . . . and *people* respond to simple, conversational, persuasive prose.
Now, that doesn’t mean you have to write to the lowest common denominator . . . if you’re writing to a specialized group with their own common jargon that they use in their everyday speech, go ahead and throw it in . . . but make sure your copy is written in a simple, friendly way that actually engages your audience.
*OK, Here’s A Little Tip On How To Do This Simply*
Now, I *hate* Microsoft Word.
I think it’s a frustrating piece of bloatware that makes writing a heck of a lot harder than it has to be.
But there is *one* feature of MS Word that keeps me coming back to the program again and again no matter how hard I try to get away, and that’s the “readability index.”
This is a cool little tool that will help you get your copy tighter and more powerful . . . and that most folks just don’t know about.
To use it, open up word, and go to “Tools” at the top of your toolbar.
Then click “Spelling and Grammar.”
In the spell check box that pops up click “options.”
And then select the box under “Grammar” that says “check readability statistics.
After Word finishes checking your spelling and grammar, it’ll show you a handy-dandy little box explaining how “readable” your copy is.
And way at the bottom you’ll get a stat called the “Fleshsch-Kincaid Grade Level.”
What you want is for your grade level to be right around 6th or 7th grade . . . which means your average 12 year old could read your copy without being terribly confused.
(As a side note, the grade level on *THIS VERY BLOG POST* is a 7.8 . . . slightly higher than I’d like, but still pretty darned readable.)
So there you go. Now you know how to use my *least* favorite piece of software to make your copy simpler and more powerful . . . and to close more sales.
Later,
Chris “Mr. Moneyfingers” Haddad
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